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Rule Number Twenty for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 14, 2020

Because the Nice Guy seeks external validation, he is often susceptible to peer pressure. His desperate need to be liked by others influences the Nice Guy to do things he wouldn't do if he were alone. Even if something feels wrong to him, if others are doing it, he will go with the flow rather...

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Rule Number Nineteen for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 13, 2020

Part of the Nice Guy's M.O. is to hide his mistakes. They are masters of the coverup. Because of their internalized belief that they are "not okay just as they are," the Nice Guy covers anything he thinks is a flaw. However, when confronted with his mistake, the Nice Guy will turn it around and...

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Rule Number Eighteen for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 12, 2020

We teach people how to treat us. When we allow the intolerable to happen, we're saying, "it's okay to treat me like that." Nice Guys tend to tolerate the unacceptable because we learned from an early age, that our needs are not important. We were also taught that If we don't stand there and suck...

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Rule Number Seventeen for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 11, 2020

Because Nice Guys are conflict avoidant, they tend to stick around, hoping things will change rather than taking action. Their conflict-avoidant nature keeps the Nice Guy from setting boundries because boundaries often need to be inforced. Instead, he continues to do what he's always done...

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Rule Number Sixteen for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 10, 2020

As I've worked with recovering Nice Guys over the last decade, I've noticed something alarming; how much shit these men put up within their relationships. Nice Guys will put up with bad behaviors over and over, but because of their Nice Guy Syndrome, they suck it up and take it. They're like an...

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Rule Number Fifteen for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 09, 2020

Most Nice Guys pride themselves on being honest. If you ask them, they will tell you that honesty is one of their highest values. But in reality, they often tell half-truths, lie by omission and withhold how they genuinely feel. The dishonesty is all part of the defense mechanism of him wanting...

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Rule Number Fourteen for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 08, 2020

I remember the day I moved a couch by myself! Why? I could have easily asked for help. There were people I could have called or friends who would have assisted. I could have asked the guy who was passing by to give me a hand up the stairs. But I didn't. Instead, I struggled and struggled. It took...

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Rule Number Thirteen for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 07, 2020

Nice Guys want a Smooth, problem-free, happy life. Nice guys believe that if they follow the rules, life will no longer give them problems. They've been taught since childhood that A plus B equals Z. 

However, when he fails to get the results he wants, instead of doing something different,...

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Rule Number Twelve for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 06, 2020

Dr. Glover points out that one of the typical Nice Guy behaviors is hiding his mistakes. When a Nice Guy fails to do something, usually his wife, partner, or boss, rather than owning up to his failing, he will put up a smokescreen to hide his mistake. The nice guy will make excuses to try to...

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Rule Number Eleven for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 05, 2020

Nice Guys are "Yes" men. Nice Guys say "yes" not because they want to say yes; because they desperately want people to like them. The Nice Guy fears that if he says "no," he will look bad and piss people off.

Since the Nice Guy has said "yes" to things he doesn't actually want to do, he becomes...

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Rule Number Ten for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 04, 2020

Nice Guys tend to over-explain everything — their fear of being misunderstood and looking bad drives them into expounding on and on about their behaviors. The slightest complaint will invoke a monolog of justification and excuses. As a result, Nice Guys are rarely clear and direct.

Dr....

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Rule Number Nine for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 03, 2020

It was the spring of my fourth-grade year, and my school was hosting our annual spring fair. The school cafeteria became a boardwalk of homemade carnival games.

I had just tossed a ping-pong ball into a cup and won something I had never seen before in my life. "What is it?" I asked my Dad.

...

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