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Rule Number Thirty for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 24, 2020

M. Scott Peck said, "Life is difficult. This is a great truth, one of the greatest truths. It is a great truth because once we truly see this truth, we transcend it. Once we truly know that life is difficult-once, we truly understand and accept it-then life is no longer ...

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Rule Number Twenty-Nine for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 23, 2020

It's okay to fail; in fact, failure is a part of life. No one is perfect. I'll often remind myself that there is a reason that pencils come with erasers, and keyboards have a backspace button. It's what we do with our "failures," which is essential. Do we learn from it, or do we continue doing...

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Rule Number Twenty-Eight for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 22, 2020

You've likely heard the stories of someone who had the corporate job, the beautiful house, fancy car, but then one day gave it all up to become an artist, a farmer, or teacher. They gave up what they had so they could get what they wanted. In every case, what the person wanted was this: PURPOSE.

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Rule Number Twenty-Seven for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 21, 2020

Nice Guys tend to live in their heads. They question everything and everyone. Nice Guys are so busy managing the emotions of everyone else that they lose themselves and forget to have fun.  

Nice Guys are often miserable. When I work with men who have the Nice Guy Syndrome, I will often ask,...

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Rule Number Twenty-Six for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 20, 2020

Procrastination is the Nice Guys kryptonite. Procrastination weakens him like nothing else. "Why do today what you can put off until some other time" is the Nice Guys mantra. Subsequently, he is usually only moderately successful in his life. He thrives in mediocrity, plays it safe, and doesn't...

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Rule Number Twenty-Five for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 19, 2020

In the book No More Mr. Nice Guy, Dr. Glover poses this question: "Why would it seem rational for a person to try to eliminate or hide certain things about himself and try to become something different unless there was a significant compelling reason for him to do so? Why
do people try to change...

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Rule Number Twenty-Four for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 18, 2020

The Nice Guy thrives on external validation. The problem with this is that when we give someone the power to validate us, we inadvertently provide them with the ability to invalidate us. For this reason, the Nice Guy avoids conflict, and difficult situations like his life depends on it.

No one...

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Rule Number Twenty-Three for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 17, 2020

Nice Guys tend to have a deprivation mindset. This way of thinking started early in his development because the Nice Guy's needs were not met in a timely and generous way. As a child, the Nice Guy concluded that there "isn't enough for him," and developed a fear that his needs would always go...

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Rule Number Twenty-Two for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 16, 2020

Years ago, I was working with a client who's shoes were utterly worn out. It wasn't that he couldn't afford new shoes; he did quite well for himself. Still, his shoes looked like he found them in a dumpster, badly beaten and soles starting to coming apart from the upper. The next week he came in;...

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Rule Number Twenty-One for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 15, 2020

"You break it; you buy it," read the sign in the store window. I was five or six when I first saw a sign like this and about to go into an antique store with my dad. "Hands in your pockets," he said as we crossed the threshold into the store of many curiosities. Tempting as it was, I knew I had 5...

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Rule Number Twenty for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 14, 2020

Because the Nice Guy seeks external validation, he is often susceptible to peer pressure. His desperate need to be liked by others influences the Nice Guy to do things he wouldn't do if he were alone. Even if something feels wrong to him, if others are doing it, he will go with the flow rather...

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Rule Number Nineteen for Overcoming the Nice Guy Syndrome 30 rules for overcoming the nice guy syndrome Feb 13, 2020

Part of the Nice Guy's M.O. is to hide his mistakes. They are masters of the coverup. Because of their internalized belief that they are "not okay just as they are," the Nice Guy covers anything he thinks is a flaw. However, when confronted with his mistake, the Nice Guy will turn it around and...

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